Give Up All of Your Excuses

If you’re not where you want to be in life, if you don’t have the body you want, the relationships you want or the career you want, you’ve probably been making excuses. You’re spinning excuses into truths so that you can defend your life and try to explain away whatever is missing for you.

Excuses are an outward manifestation of incompetence, fear, self-doubt or laziness. It’s a reason you give for not changing the things you hate but do nothing about. There are many common excuses that keep people from having a successful life, and you may want to see if any of these resonate with how you’ve been feeling.

I Don’t Have the Time

You say this because successful people, those who have a life they love, a career that makes them plenty of money, obviously magically created more than 24 hours in a day.

Those whose careers have skyrocketed didn’t spin straw into time.

They didn’t have a genie in a bottle to grant them three wishes where all three were the desire to have longer days. They got where they are because they wanted it and because they worked to make it happen.

You know that already. You just either don’t want to face it or it makes you uncomfortable. Because then you’d have to realize that the problem is not that you lack time.

It’s that you lack effort. What’s sad about that is that it’s you not believing in yourself. You want other people to believe in you, to root for your success - but you won’t even stand up for yourself.

You won’t demand the time of yourself. Until you do that, you can kiss success goodbye. You do have the time. The same amount of time that the most successful people have.

But where they’re being productive with their time, you’re plopped on the sofa with a bag of chips, binge watching your favorite show for hours. If you’re going to settle for a lesser life, then at least be honest with yourself about it.

You don’t have the time because you don’t make time. You don’t make the hard choices; you don’t sacrifice and you don’t say no to time-thieves. It’s easier to be frustrated - to tell yourself that you don’t have time because others are too needy, because the dog threw up on the carpet again, because you had to work overtime, because your genes make you too tired to and you need more sleep/vacation/party time than other people do.

The first step to changing your life is being honest about it. Just tell yourself, “I say I don’t have the time because I don’t really want to do it.” It’s safer to stay wrapped up in the familiar comfort of the time excuse, because everyone knows if you had the time, you’d totally change your life, your community, and even the world.

You’re a success waiting to happen. And waiting…and waiting…

You really think you don’t have time? Check it yourself. Time everything you do from the moment you get up. Write down what you’re doing. Did you make a quick trip to the store, only for it to turn into almost an hour because your attention was nabbed by a new product, old friend, or flirtation that stole your time because you allowed it?

Do you need ten hours of sleep because you were up late partying, playing video games, watching TV, emailing a friend or playing on social media? Really? That’s what you’re trading success for?

You’ve got two choices here when you think you don’t have the time. You either find it or you get to the end of your life in the same position you’re in right now. Get to the root of this excuse and eliminate it.

I’m Too Old

This excuse has been applied to so many areas of life. Too old to start a new career. Too old to lose weight. Too old to find a new romantic partner. That’s you if you tell yourself that you want to get in shape but your body just isn’t young anymore.

Or if you wish you could choose a different career, but you stay where you are because that’s where your experience is. Maybe you stay with the wrong relationship because you fear you’re too old to find someone else.

The biggest reason people use the too old excuse is when it comes to changing their career. They believe that they’ve spent 20 or more years in one career and going back to college now would be a waste of money or time.

The new path is scary. It’s much better at your age to remain where you am. That’s what you tell yourself. But the thing about it is, life changes. You change as a person. Your desires, dreams, and hopes change.

So why can’t your career? You not changing anything and saying that it’s your age is an excuse. There are thousands of people who are in their 40s, 50s, 60s and beyond who change their careers.

You might be in the same age range, but the reason they found happiness with career success later in life is that they took action instead of just wished for something to happen.

Maybe you’ve had the same career since college. It’s what you went to school to learn. While college is a good thing, most 18 year old kids don’t know what they truly want out of life.

They go to college because they’re supposed to graduate and find a good, steady job. So they do all that and then end up stuck, living out a life they’re supposed to with the excuse that now it’s too late to change.

Not everyone’s like that. Some people have a wake-up call, realize they hate their career or they feel like it’s not what they want anymore and they immediately make changes.

They take off running and never look back, willing to jump and take a chance rather than sit still even for one more day. You know what happens if you cling to the notion that you’re too old to change your life?

If you treat that excuse like a warm, fuzzy security blanket that you hold on to for all you’re worth? You get what you’re willing to accept. You get a life where you’re too old to do anything about because even though it’s never too late to change, you made that excuse your reality. You created the world that you live in.

Only you can hit the pause button, take a deep breath and go in a new direction. Your age isn’t in control of your life. You are. So take control back from this excuse and go for what you want.

I Don’t Have the Money to Change My Life

Of course, this is a very valid excuse because everyone in the world knows that unless you have money, you can’t possibly change your life. You can’t lose weight without money.

You can’t get healthy without it. Relationships never change without money. Your career can’t go anywhere without money. If you believe the lies above, that’s exactly why you’re still in the same place you’ve been stuck for years - for decades.

Break those excuses down one by one with the truth. Refute them and set yourself free to change your life. Look at the weight loss excuse. While there are numerous expensive programs out there that do take money, there are equally as many, if not more programs that are free.

You know what else is free? Determination. To the determined person, a path opens up. It always does. Because determination says you’re done sitting still, that it’s time for some movement.

Weight loss can be done through free online meetings. Don’t have access to the internet? Your library does. There are free in person meetings. There are free healthy food menus.

Free tips, free advice everywhere. Face the facts - it’s not money that’s keeping those extra pounds on you. It’s excuses. A lack of willingness to put in the hard work. If you’re struggling with your health and think that’s holding you back because you don’t have money, that’s an excuse, too.

There are free health programs, free dental programs, and even free prescriptions. It takes effort to find them, but they are there. Relationships are good or bad because of the people involved, not because of a lack of money.

If your relationships are in the gutter, it’s either because of you or them. Not having money for career improvements so you don’t do anything to further it is an excuse. There are bartering situations you can offer, mentorships you can find.

But you don’t try because you let yourself be convinced that a lack of money was the problem. What’s awful about using the lack of money as an excuse is it will always pay you back with more excuses.

You’ll start to accept that you don’t have money for anything and never will. You’ll develop a poverty mindset. Grow bitter. Envious. You’ll look at others and think they got lucky.

Common money excuses are: There’s no way for me to improve my income. I’d be rich too if I had his job, car, skills, support system or whatever other excuse you can think of. It’s not possible for me to budget, invest, or save.

Those are signs of excuses, not proof that you’re incapable. The truth is, you use money as an excuse because you don’t want to sacrifice by working hard. You want an easy fix.

But it takes effort to create the income you want. If you’re not willing to work at it, then your excuse will always be your truth. The belief that it takes money to make money is false. It’s something people tell themselves to cover up the real reason they’ve failed continually.

I Can’t Get Anything Started or Finished

This excuse is known by its alter-ego: procrastination. Welcome to doing it tomorrow. Or the next day. Or someday. Procrastination is an avoidance tactic. It’s an excuse you use to wiggle your way out of being responsible for something - bathing the dog, handling the car maintenance, starting the work project, losing the extra weight, or having the tough conversation with the irritating relative.

You put off doing those things and you come up with all sorts of valid (to you) reasons why you’re putting them off - but the bottom line is regardless of how you rationalize it in your mind, it’s an excuse.

One of your favorite go-to excuses that allows procrastination to flourish like those annoying weeds in your yard is this: I’ll get this done tomorrow. Then tomorrow comes to a close and the task or life change is still sitting there, weighing on you.

But you shrug it off and put it right back into its familiar slot. The new tomorrow. Or maybe you tell yourself that you just don’t have the time. If that’s your excuse, go back to the beginning of this chapter and reread that part.

You know why a lot of people, yourself included, procrastinate? Because you look at the change that needs to be made and think about how hard it will be. You see that losing the weight you want to lose is going to take you a year.

And that’s just way too hard. You know what’s difficult? Wheezing when you’re walking up the stairs. Your aching joints. Your low self-esteem. Heart disease. Diabetes. That’s hard, too.

You just have to decide which difficulty you want to accept. Don’t worry if you procrastinate making a choice because eventually, life will make one for you. Eventually, your health will demand action.

Or the relationship you’re procrastinating doing something about will reach a chaotic point. Or you’ll hit the ceiling in your career and the only choice will be to live with it because your colleague swooped in and improved his skills, made his move and he got the better paying position.

You know you’re smarter and have longevity with the company. But he had something better. He had action on his side and now he’s your supervisor. The big procrastination excuse that people (and probably you also) struggle with is that what you want in life just isn’t important enough to shake you out of your inertia.

Yes, you want a better career - and someday, you’re going do something about that. Someday. If you look on the calendar, there’s not a square for someday. What you have is today.

You want changes? Stop putting it off. Tomorrow isn’t going to be a better time to start. You won’t suddenly get smarter, richer, or more confident. You just have to go for what you want right now.

Sometimes, the procrastination excuse happens when you don’t know what life direction to take. Because you’re confused, you don’t do anything – you stay paralyzed. But life isn’t going to drop a sign right in front of you telling you which way you need to go. You can figure that out on your own, as long as you choose something other than nothing.

How to Give Up All Your Excuses and Pursue Change

If you want to have a good life - you want to lose the weight, have good health, the great relationships and the awesome career - then the excuses have to go. There isn’t room in a successful life for excuses.

You have to first let what you want become greater than whatever excuse you’re giving. When it comes to making excuses, like most people, you’re settling instead of pursuing the best life you could have.

You’re trading success for mediocrity. When you want something, you have to let that desire balloon until it’s your whole focus. Then let your focus become greater than your excuses - greater than your fears - greater than your procrastination.

You have to realize that you may never feel like you have enough time and you have to go for what you want anyway. Stop letting money be your excuse and accept that what you have to work with is what you have - and find a way in spite of it.

Sure, it’s going to be tough. You’ll make sacrifices. But if you can’t get past that, then you really just didn’t want it badly enough. You have to imagine your life five years down the road.

Do you really still want to be overweight? Unhealthy? Miserable in a relationship? Stuck in your career? Then get rid of all your excuses. The thing about excuses is that just when you think you’ve conquered them, you discover that they were waiting for you to be vulnerable enough so they could pounce and drag you back to inaction.

Realize that excuses are your enemies. They will hold you down, hold you back, and rob you of success. You may never be completely free of excuses because it’s human nature to whine, bargain, and give up when things get rough.

What you have to do is go after the change that you want in your life despite your excuses. You must determine in your mind what you want and remain firm that second best isn’t an option.

You can stay committed by knowing why you want the change in your life. When you find that, you’ll find your motivation - and that can be a lot more powerful than any excuse.